Day 19: A Sad Day

  I write this post at the end of a day that was a struggle for me. It wasn't just a struggle for me, but also for my family. My step-dad's father passed away last night. My parents have been married almost 20 years now. Before any of that, I knew this man. I've known him my whole life. Before he became Granddaddy, I knew him. 

  I do not imagine that I feel the same as my step-siblings or my cousins, but that doesn't mean I am not sad. This man made me feel welcome. He made me feel loved. He wrote the most wonderful letters for Christmas. I have saved every one he ever wrote. They will be treasured always.

  The drive to work was painful. I was on the phone with my mom and I text my step-sister. Please understand my step-sister has evolved over the years into my sister, but as I have a confusing family, I say it as a point of reference and not as a point of separation. I was ok until I sat at my desk. My new job was very accommodating and told me if I needed a day I could go home. He wouldn't have wanted that and it wouldn't have helped me. 

  Today for keto wasn't difficult. I did get hungry, but then I ate. I felt a little lightheaded and then I had an electrolyte water and I felt better. I have been starting my workday with 2 tablespoons of Apple Cider Vinegar with a flavored sparkling water. This has been helping abate some of the carb flu symptoms. That and we've really been making an effort to get more rest. My boyfriend was feeling quite a few symptoms today. I encouraged him to take pomegranate vinegar in some flavored water and get more rest. 

  I had a mostly balanced day today, but it was a sad day. When sad days happen we want comfort food. We have both been very excellent at being good. Today wasn't really any different. The only difference is I ate comfort food that was keto. My boyfriend wasn't feeling well and I didn't want him to feel like he needed to cook dinner. (Again, not sponsored by anyone). I picked up Chipotle on the way home. Yup, you can keep keto and eat at Chipotle. 

  We both ordered a salad. No dressing. Double meat. He had steak & chicken. I had carnitas & steak. Topped with cheese and guacamole. Delicious. Totally keto. When I'm sad, chocolate is always wanted. I did ask my boyfriend earlier in the day if we could make Keto Chocolate Mousse. Did I mention this man is amazing?! He made it for me. I got to have a keto dessert and get the chocolate I thought I was craving. 

  It is possible to eat out and do keto. It's possible to have some chocolate and be keto. The macros today weren't of great importance to me. I wanted comfort food. I felt I needed it. I feel better knowing that I ate keto. I know I'm not going to feel bloated and gross and really regret what I ate. Tomorrow I won't feel this way. 

  Now it's time to relax and go to sleep and perhaps change the fish tank.