Day 197: Reflections

Well, time has escaped me again. We all have the best of intentions to accomplish things and they simply get away from us. So much has happened in almost a month. I’ve now lost about 23lbs. I’m about 11.5lbs from my “goal”weight. I’m very happy with how things are fitting and how I’m looking. I’m comfortable and that’s key.

The last five days have been trying. Wednesday night, November 7, there was a mass shooting at a bar 5 miles from my work. Now, while my boyfriend and I don’t go out, it’s still devastating. We are safe. We can see the bar on our drive to and from work each day. A co-worker of mine was invited to the bar, she didn’t go. She lost two friends in that shooting.

Thursday, November 8, the Woolsey and Hill Fires broke out in Ventura County. The Hill Fire at one point was directly behind our place of work. We were evacuated. It was the first time that has ever happened to me. It was scary. I have included photos of the fire below. I was grateful that my boyfriend and I were together during this time and knowing my pet was safe.

Several of my co-workers had to evacuate their houses. I don’t know if they all have their homes still. Friday we went back into work and worked a half day. It took us over an hour to get there and the same to get home. We found out at work that the fires had gotten worse and our main route to work was blocked off.

Friday night, November 9, it turns out that my friend Stacy passed away. She lost her battle to cancer. This hit me so much harder than I thought it would. I don’t mean to sound insensitive. Stacy was my best friend from high school’s, well on of her other best friends. I was never jealous as my best friend has room in her heart for everyone and I never once felt less important to her.

I’m surprised that I’m hit so hard since my interactions with her were limited to group events. Her kindness was boundless and she was such a bright light in this world. I rarely spoke to her outside of those gatherings other than commenting on photos on Facebook or Instagram. She left behind a wife and child. My heart goes out to them and her family.

Yesterday evening, our lovely bulldog somehow scratched his eye. I took him to the vet today. He needs antibiotic ointment on it for a week and then a recheck. I kept having difficulty not crying. I’m not ashamed. This has been an extremely trying several days. I made the choice with some advice from my love and my good friend to take care of myself.

I’ve been resting. Sometimes you need to do what your body is telling you. I was in the process of writing a post about how I haven’t gotten to things I have wanted to. In that process, I realized it doesn’t really matter. I didn’t want to complain. I was overwhelmed with all that had happened and wanted to deflect.

I am grateful to my bosses for their understanding. I’m feeling much better. I’ve been watching my passed out bulldog as well. He has been cuddled up by me all day. He has only now just gotten up realizing that his dad is home. I love my little family.